and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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