I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
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tequila makes me forget i have legs
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
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I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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