so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
