Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize