Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Randomize