Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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