We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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