Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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