Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
