Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Randomize