we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize