it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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