There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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