Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
