I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
