HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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