I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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