nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
