Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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