Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
You are the jesus of drinking
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize