I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
