gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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