We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
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The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
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It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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