You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
