At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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