I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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