How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
