Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
