I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
its liver damage thursday
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize