I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
