Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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