Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
