the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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