The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
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