we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I lost the right to judge tonight
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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