Do vagina's smell?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
