Christians are straight up FREAKS
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
