idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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