The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
