What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
