I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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