Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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