You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
