My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
