Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(314): View more from Missouri

dude did u upper deck my toilet?

(1-314): View more from Missouri

haha like two months ago

(314): View more from Missouri

i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u

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(314): dude did u upper deck my toilet? (1-314): haha like two months ago (314): i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u http://tfl.nu/8xxw

Replies (38) Good night (890) Bad night (4270)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.

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(832): i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life. http://tfl.nu/0m3z

Replies (29) Good night (1534) Bad night (3251)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined

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(609): I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined http://tfl.nu/fupt

Replies (19) Good night (4863) Bad night (1271)
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(+31): View more from The Netherlands

bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.

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(+31): bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left. http://tfl.nu/sy8j

Replies (18) Good night (1439) Bad night (6429)
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(520): View more from Arizona

Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.

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(520): Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded. http://tfl.nu/om7e

Replies (9) Good night (3430) Bad night (1238)
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(727): View more from Florida

I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am

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(727): I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am http://tfl.nu/ogdh

Replies (7) Good night (885) Bad night (1302)
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(386): View more from Florida

At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?

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(386): At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"? http://tfl.nu/260m

Replies (12) Good night (2162) Bad night (601)
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(916): View more from California

Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.

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(916): Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you. http://tfl.nu/jbv6

Replies (11) Good night (2997) Bad night (904)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.

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(503): Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here. http://tfl.nu/jknc

Replies (13) Good night (1233) Bad night (594)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth

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(336): Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth http://tfl.nu/r0sd

Replies (8) Good night (1517) Bad night (431)
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(469): View more from Texas

HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.

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(469): HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK. http://tfl.nu/uhfo

Replies (5) Good night (1402) Bad night (518)
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(407): View more from Florida

That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!

(386): View more from Florida

Gravity is no match for my libido

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(407): That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work! (386): Gravity is no match for my libido http://tfl.nu/l272

Replies (2) Good night (891) Bad night (304)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.

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(902): I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at. http://tfl.nu/m09a

Replies (3) Good night (568) Bad night (310)
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(646): View more from New York

Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.

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(646): Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini. http://tfl.nu/wt6x

Replies (3) Good night (664) Bad night (187)
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(716): View more from New York

We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.

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(716): We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that. http://tfl.nu/ks3a

Replies (3) Good night (447) Bad night (215)

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