yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
