did you get engaged???
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
