i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
you never un-have a 4some
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
