like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
