i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?